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“What others have to say about us is none of our business.”

It’s a true statement, but it will not serve us well until we look into the real reasons we become upset from what others say about us. Because if we don’t, we will continue to react even when we don’t want to.

“Faith without works is dead” James 2:14-16

Looking back, it felt like someone stuck me with their sharp knife whenever I heard anyone talking shit about me. I would then react in two unhealthy ways; one, verbally attack back which could turn ugly quickly or two, pretend like it didn’t bother me. Trust me; you would prefer the first way because if I pretended it didn’t bother me, look out, I would keep it for a rainy day and get you back tenfold.


Because I had a shame-based personality from the earliest I could remember and low self- worth from years of addiction. I was set up to react in these unconscious ways even though I would feel terrible doing it. Every time someone talked about what I perceived to be a negative comment about me, I felt rejected because I didn’t like or know who I was.

Getting over this didn't happen overnight, it has taken me years of awakening work to undo the old subconscious programming and experience LOVE as our true state of being.

Today whenever I hear people talking shit about me I know it’s not about me anymore it’s about them because I have pulled out the rejection button of shame out by the roots.

I also came to realize that people who talk shit from the sidelines are usually the ones too scared to do the work themselves; it puts it all into perspective.

The more we succeed, the more shit others will say about us, it kind of goes with the territory. Especially if we have big or unique dreams that might be a little different than what is considered normal in the world. The world wants us all in boxes, I say f- - k conformity, it is the death of living an authentic life.

Instead, I look at smack talk as a compass that says we are moving in the right direction. So find your thing, put on the blinders and forget about the haters.


Paul Noiles

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