Most people do not want to accept that their unhealed childhood experiences (trauma) created a template of suffering and pain in their adult lives. Instead, they tell themselves to get over it by blaming the "monkey mind" for their perpetual anxiety or worse - blame others.
"Until we stop blaming the mind – and recognize that anxieties stem from the unresolved emotional body – there will be no liberation" – Jeff Brown.
That was me; I shut down my emotional life in early childhood to survive my trauma. This coping strategy continued right into adulthood and kept me from thriving in all areas of my life.
Avoidance of my feelings and fixated on my mind was set up for disaster, i.e., I developed an addiction as the solution to my emotional pain. So remember, the originates of trauma are held within the body, so healing must happen within the body. Healing trauma is a challenging and painful process. No wonder people run from the emotional healing work.
Trauma is not just the big stuff; sexual, physical, or emotional abuse. It's not the suicide of a loved one, absent caregivers, neglected babies, or when a soldier is shot. The event's aftermath is how an individual internally processes the event, and what it does to use within the body, mind (beliefs about self), and spirit. It takes away who we are in relationship to ourselves, others, and the world. It cripples us without knowing our decisions are not free choices but coming from programming from our past trauma.
The mind and the body can't be separated. It's not that there's a psyche separate from our physiology. The psyche and physiology are part and parcel of our organism and are designed for survival. They're inseparable, so whatever happens psychically happens on a deep physiological level.
Acknowledging, feeling, and accepting the pain in my body were the first steps to my healing. It was so difficult at the beginning because I was disconnected from my emotional life for the great majority of my life. Unless we address the emotional aftermath of trauma, it will continue to affect all areas of our lives.
Today I am thriving because I made a life-saving decision to dive into the hard work of healing my trauma and today I facilitate healing so others can do the same.
Finally, I want to state that having all this information will not heal you, you have to do the healing work. Knowing shit in your head doesn’t heal you.
WE DO RECOVER Paul Noiles