Detachment is critical to our spiritual awakening and recovery because when we attach our identity to anything or anyone, we can lose control of our ability to think, feel, act and take care of ourselves.
I.E.- a person, drug, alcohol , money, food, sex, gambling, cigarettes, violence, raging, negative thinking, victimhood, etc.........
We cannot begin to work on ourselves until we are able to detach from the objects of our obsession.
There’s a great verse in the Bhagavad Gita that says:
It is not about withdrawing from the world or keeping our family, friends and loved ones at a distance or not having nice things or being without emotions or desires because then it owns us. It’s about having the true knowledge of allowing nothing to own us however if it does, we probably need to reach out for help, like I had too.
“Detaching does not mean we don’t care. It means we learn to love, care and be involved without going crazy.” Melody Beattie
Worrying, obsessing and controlling keep us stuck on the hamster wheel of the mind, and we lose ourselves and our connection to Source.
Detachment is the premise that we are all responsible for ourselves and no other. We must let go of the false belief that it’s our job to solve or worry about problems that aren’t ours.
When should we detach?
“When we can’t stop thinking, talking about, or worrying about someone or something; when our emotions are churning and boiling; when we feel like we have to do something about someone because we can’t stand it another minute; When we’re hanging on by a thread, and it feels like that single thread is frayed; and when we believe we can no longer live with the problem we’ve been trying to live with. It is time to detach! You will learn to recognize when detachment is advisable. A good rule of thumb is: You need to detach most when it seems the least likely or possible thing to do.” ~ Melody Beattie from her book Codependent No More.
Detachment is the practice of faith. We must stop playing god and let go of our self-centred ways. The world can be perfectly OK without us because anytime we try to control any part of the Universe we will fail 100 percent of the time.
In life, there are only three things we control: our action, our reaction and our attitude. Detachment involves the full acceptance of what IS; which can only happen in the here and NOW.
Knowing that nothing can own us is directly related to our relationship with the ONE (whatever you choose to call IT). The ONE manifests as us, as matter, as spirit, as mind, as thought and as everything else and the more we experience IT, the more we can let go of our attachments. It is when we forget this relationship with LIFE and the ONE Power (that many call God) we create our limitations and suffering.
Satnam Paul Noiles