It took me a long time to figure out – baring my soul was the greatest gift I could give myself, others and the world.
Because I felt humiliated for being a sensitive soul who liked to bare his soul as a little boy, and over time, being put down took its toll, and I began to hide my true feelings from everyone. The real me got lost in the process, but you would never know that because I became a great actor. Fear does crazy shit to little people.
Even today, writing about my past brings back tears; however, my tears, this time, are from deep gratitude and joy.
Because I woke-up and now know LOVE as my true state of being and, at no time, was I not One with LOVE (GOD) during my painful childhood or the lost years of addiction, pain, suffering, two suicide attempts, homelessness, death of someone I loved deeply, divorce and I could go on.
And through all of it were two influential mentors, many spiritual teachers, mom, my sister, a few close friends who never gave on my recovery well I was transformed in the fire of suffering, the work of recovery and GRACE upon GRACE.
However, none of that would have happened, had I not found my creative inner voice that stopped in childhood. Slowly, I began to bare my soul again, but this time there would be no stopping me and healing commenced. The more baring, the more healing and I began to trust life again, and eventually, I woke-up to the GREAT LIGHT.
Baring, my soul saved my life. It’s how I came out of hiding and healed my past trauma. It’s how I found my true inner freedom. It’s how I learned I was enough. Today, it’s my greatest gift that I freely give to others, and it allows others to feel safe enough to bare their souls with me. And LOVE is in the middle healing everything.
Remember, the only way to deal with the voice toxic shame (I am not enough) is to bare our soul with another. Trust me; you will be thankful that you did. Now go have a great day, the world needs you!
Satnam (truth is my identity) Paul Noiles